Wally Woodchuck Gets Stimulated by an “Economic Stimulus Package” a parable about Fiscal Irresponsibility

 

by

Charlie Champion

 

Wally Woodchuck was full of himself. He was cool, he knew it, and anyone who didn’t recognize his coolness was very uncool.

If you had any doubts about Wally’s specialness, just ask him..” I’m hip, I’m Cool. Lay it on me , baby” He would reply, looking down his nose at such a plebeian question.

Several months ago, while surfing the City garbage dump, Wally had found a pair of discarded, Barbie doll , sun glasses. They were oversized by woodchuck standards, but with the help of a length of salvaged wire, they were able to perch precipitously on the bridge of his nose.

Wally looked at his reflection in a pool of water, ” These glasses are the final touch.” He thought. ” I’m much too fine to do any woodchucking. That type of work is only for suckers and regular Woodchucks.. The other Woodchucks should feed me and take care of all my health and wealth needs.

After all” He continued,” I’ ve worked very hard at being too cool to work. It’s much more fun to drink with my friends, chase after females in heat, and get free food from public storage during the Winter.”

He ambled over to the local wood pile, and leaned against a stump.

There was a group of 10 or 12 woodchucks busy at work, chucking the wood into ragged piles.

His noticed three of his buddies working as part of the group.

He snickered as Warren Woodchuck picked up a length of tree limb.” Hey Willie , look at sexy Wanda Woodchuck.” He pointed off to his right.

When Willie Woodchuck looked away, searching for Wanda, Warren chucked the branch he was holding, landing a glancing blow at the back of Willies head.

” Hey who did that?” Growled Willie, in mock anger. ” Who hit me in the head?” He looked around the work group, while reaching down to pick up a clod of mud.

As Willie straightened up, he threw the muddy clump aiming at Warren’s head.

Seeing the approaching mud ball, Warren ducked. The mud ball sailed over his head and hit group leader Winston, smack in the snout.

The ensuing melee lasted far too long, and left several members of the group nurseing injuries, effectively ending any any additional work getting done.

Still chuckling, Wally went over to his friends.” Look at you guys! What a sight.” He shook his head,.” You all certainly made a mess. All the wood that you chucked is gone, mashed in with the mud.”

Willie’s black nose glistened with moisture, and a splatter of brown mud. ” What do you think we should do, Wally? The Union leaders, and their supervisors will be angry that we ruined all this work.” He rubbed his mouth. ” I chucked so much wood that my teeth hurt.”.

” Who are you kidding?” Sneered Wally. “Your teeth hurt because Winston Woodchuck smacked you in the mouth for hitting him with that mud.”

Willie looked sheepish. ” Perhaps you are right. So what do we do to fix this mess?”

” We go to the Union Hall and talk to Wingo. He’s our representative to the Bosses. They can’t do anything without Wingo’s O K .You know that.”

Willie sighed . ” I forgot. Things have changed so much since the World economy crashed two years ago.Everything is so different.So easy. They tell us what to do. When and how to do it, I get tax rebate checks even if I don’t work.”

Wally Woodchuck nodded in agreement. “As long as the Red Woodchuck’s United party remains in power, we can’t get fired.Our share of the Annual Spending Stimulus (A . S . S . ) Pays for our food. Takes care of our landlord. Pays for our health care. We get a monthly stimulus payment. ” He looked at his friend.” And if we mess up at work, our union covers our ASS.”

Warren walked over and joined his friends. Reaching out he patted Willie on the back.” Wally’s right” He said.” Let someone else clean up the mess. There are plenty of woodchuck’s wanting to work.Let them do it if they are so industrious.. Hard work and responsibility are such old fashioned concepts. .”

” Right on baby,” Said cool Wally. The sunlight bounced off his shades, rendering his eyes invisible.” Pre bailout is pase. Give me my stimulus, and let me go play.Working is for squares.Let someone else do it”

He thought about it for a moment, then smiled.” Yes thats it, Let someone else do it. Our New motto. Let someone elase do it.”

Warren and Willie picked up the chant. “Let someone else do it!” They shouted in unison.”Let someone else do it.”

The Economic Rescue and Stimulus Package.(E.R.S.P.) had accomplished its goal.

Woodchuck ambition and innovation had been replaced by government employment. Everyone got a job. Working was optional.

Healthcare was available to every person in the Country, and the quality was equally low and slow for all.

The standard of living was permanentally lowered, but no citizen was forced to work for their lowered standard.

And of course, most important of all,THE RED WOODCHUCKS UNITED party( TRWU) was the benevolent orchestrator of out welfare, safety, and what we can think from now on.

A very comforting thought.

 

 

 

No Responses to “Wally Woodchuck Gets Stimulated by an “Economic Stimulus Package” a parable about Fiscal Irresponsibility”

  1. Evancho says:

    You mention such a great things here and it is always pleassure to read. Hope to hear more and learn from you.

  2. Vernell says:

    Greetings! Is it okay if I go a bit off topic? I am trying to read your domain on my Macbook but it doesn’t display properly, any suggestions? You can always email me at [email protected] Thanks in advance! Vernell

  3. Very useful post. Bookmarked. Thanks for it!

  4. Hello thanks for this very good post. But I still don’t get the second part though!

  5. Poker says:

    Only want to say your article is astounding. The clarity in your post is simply spectacular and i can take for granted you are an expert on this field. Well with your permission allow me to grab your rss feed to keep up to date with succeeding post. Thanks a million and please keep up the gratifying work.

  6. lego says:

    Simply want to say your article is striking. The clearness in your post is simply impressive and i can take for granted you are an expert on this field. Well with your permission allow me to grab your rss feed to keep up to date with succeeding post. Thanks a million and please keep up the ac complished work.

  7. aparadekto says:

    Hey, I can’t view your site properly within Opera, I actually hope you look into fixing this.

  8. Im not going to say what everyone else has already said, but I do want to comment on your knowledge of the topic. Youre truly well-informed. I cant believe how much of this I just wasnt aware of. Thank you for bringing more information to this topic for me. Im truly grateful and really impressed. <a href="//legosforgirls.info/

  9. Absolutely amazing blog.

  10. While this matter can be very difficult for most people, my impression is that there has to be a middle or common ground that we all can find. I do treasure that you’ve added pertinent and rational commentary here though. Thank you!

  11. After reading this I thought it was very informative. I appreciate you taking the time and effort to put this post together. Once again I find myself spending way to much time both reading and commenting. But so what, it was still worth it! <a href="//stuhrlingwatches.info/

  12. payday loans says:

    I respect the helpful facts you offer in your posts. I will bookmark your blog site and have my children check up here often. I am quite sure they will learn lots of new stuff here than anybody else!

  13. Mati says:

    This is an extremely informative article. You were able to grab my interest with your original ideas. I agree with most of your insightful views. Thank you for making sure you keep your readers engaged.

  14. I like material like this. This is a great article and I really enjoyed reading it. You have an original style that makes your ideas stand out from other writers.

  15. I can appreciate great writing when I read it. This is truly great writing. You make valid and interesting points that you have presented in a unique way. This is an excellent high quality article.

  16. I have been reading and reviewing your article for a few minutes to ponder some of your sound points. I like the way you think and I agree on a large portion of this content.

  17. I’m simply in awe of this article. How you were able to make this topic engaging is beyond my imagination. I am glad I got to read this. Thank you.

  18. Informative content like you’ve written here is usually rather drab and lacking in varying views. You, on the other hand have managed to make this interesting and varied. I share many of your unique thoughts.

  19. You have a special gift for writing. You can express your thoughts in unique, original content. This information is formatted in easy to read terminology that nearly any reader can understand. Thank you for sharing.

  20. matikochavi says:

    You are simply amazing! I have never read articles on this subject matter that made so much sense. Your points are right on and solid as a rock! Thank you.

  21. Great post. Thanks for the helpful cheat sheets. Now maybe I’ll get my head wrapped around this stuff. Probably not, but it’s a goal. Gotta have them goals.

  22. Thank you for such a well thought out method of informational writing. I have had to start thinking outside the box on the fresh information that you have posted here.

  23. I enjoy your piece of work, thanks for all the good posts .

  24. This is a very informative reading. You’ve really gotten my interest on many points. I agree with most of your points and am presently examining the rest. Thank you for keeping your writing so interesting.

  25. I suppose I could pose questions about your article, but since it’s so clear I guess I’ll just make a comment. I think this information is well-written, useful and interesting.

  26. new xbox 360 says:

    I have never seen such impressive ideas presented in writing. Your writer has a very unique way of presenting information in such a way as to catch the reader’s attention.

  27. This article had to take you a lot of research time. I am impressed with the formatting and content. I agree on a lot of what you have written here.

  28. side effects of raspberry ketone supplements…

    […]Wally Woodchuck Gets Stimulated by an “Economic Stimulus Package” a parable about Fiscal Irresponsibility « The Adventures of Charlie Champion[…]…

  29. aaronhargo.com…

    I enjoy what you guys are usually up too. Such clever work and coverage! Keep up the very good works guys I’ve you guys to our blogroll….

  30. キプリング バッグ says:

    I? not that much of a internet reader to be honest but your blogs really nice, keep it up! I’ll go ahead and bookmark your website to come back later on. All the best
    <a href="http://www.proltd.com/kipling【

  31. お財布 says:

    Do you mind if I quote a couple of your articles as long as I provide credit and sources back to your site? My blog site is in the very same niche as yours and my visitors would certainly benefit from some of the information you present here. Please let me know if this ok with you. Appreciate it!
    お財布
    [url=http://www.bioagritest.com/kate-spade財布-japan-6.html]お財布[/url]

  32. citizen says:

    Please let me know if you’re looking for a article writer for your blog. You have some really great posts and I feel I would be a good asset. If you ever want to take some of the load off, I’d love to write some articles for your blog in exchange for a link back to mine. Please shoot me an e-mail if interested. Thanks!
    citizen
    [url=http://www.linkagejapan.com/シチズン【Citizen】-japan-61.html]citizen[/url]

  33. led電球 says:

    Howdy! Do you know if they make any plugins to safeguard against hackers? I’m kinda paranoid about losing everything I’ve worked hard on. Any suggestions?
    led電球
    [url=http://light.ejinc.com/led-スポットライト-japan-5.html]led電球[/url]

  34. proteca says:

    I? not that much of a internet reader to be honest but your sites really nice, keep it up! I’ll go ahead and bookmark your site to come back in the future. Cheers
    <a href="http://www.proltd.com/proteca【プ

  35. Wally Woodchuck Gets Stimulated by an “Economic Stimulus Package” a parable about Fiscal Irresponsibility « The Adventures of Charlie Champion
    Camisas D&G Hombre

  36. I’m just commenting to make you be aware of what a superb encounter my child experienced using your webblog. She even learned a wide variety of details, including what it’s like to possess a marvelous coaching style to get folks really easily learn several grueling matters. You really surpassed visitors’ desires. I appreciate you for displaying these informative, trusted, educational and in addition unique guidance on your topic to Julie.

  37. Usually I don’t read article on blogs, however I wish to say that this write-up very forced me to check out and do so! Your writing style has been surprised me. Thanks, very great article.

  38. Thank you for the sensible critique. Me & my neighbor were just preparing to do a little research on this. We got a grab a book from our area library but I think I learned more clear from this post. I am very glad to see such fantastic info being shared freely out there.
    スポーツウェア

Leave a Reply